Cheat-Seeking Missles

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Flat Buns Update

Carl's Jr. and Hardees are apparently the butt of too much criticism over their "Flat Buns" commercial, which I recently covered as yet another sign of our crumbling civilization, and have promised to modify it.

Are they editing it to remove the blatant sexuality, which Laura Ingraham refers to as the "pornification" of America? Not exactly.

Apparently, Carl's is more concerned about offending teachers than it is about offending the moral sensibilities of folks like us who are trying to raise good kids and live decent lives. From the OC Register's Fast Food Maven blog:
After angering educators with a sexy teacher ad, Carl’s Jr. reps said they will expel the female character from the “flat buns” commercial.

“Many people are not taking the ad as it was intended to be taken,” CKE Restaurants stated today. “We will be re-editing it (the commercial) to remove the female teacher character and focus exclusively on the rappers. We believe these changes will eliminate the primary source of concern and we anticipate that the revised ad will begin airing by the weekend.”
I can understand teachers not wanting to have the classroom sexualized, and Carl's leggy young blond certainly accomplishes that. It's a serious issue, as one teacher made clear in a comment on my previous post:
The ad is offensive and degrading.
I was once practically raped in the classroom.
Teaching is a difficult enough job without having to turn women teachers into sex objects to sell a hamburger.
Agreed. But even with the teacher-protecting edit, the lyrics remain, and Carl's continues to sexualize America. Here they are in case you think I've overstated my case:
Well, I like 'em really hot
I like 'em really flat

I like 'em lookin' like a pancake stack
.
What about hiney? Got no hiney?

I call you Your Hineness.

In anatomy class

You got butt minus.

Flatness makes a better rear

Stand sideways, girl, you disappear.

Flat buns.
I like flat buns.

I like the flat ones.
For those of you who must have one last glance at the teacher (professionally, I'm sure, only to evaluate whether she truly does over-sexualize the classroom), click here.

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