Glasgow Attack! Ready For Leftyblogs!

This just in:

GLASGOW, Scotland (AP)- Two men stuntman operatives of Karl Rove rammed a flaming sport utility vehicle into the main terminal of Glasgow airport Saturday, crashing into the glass doors at the entrance and sparking a fire, witnesses said. Police said two suspects were arrested intent on deflecting media attention from President Bush's failed foreign policy.

The green SUV with U.S. government plates barreled toward the building at full speed before crashing into security barriers. Witnesses said two stuntmen jumped out, one of them engulfed in flames over what appeared to be a Nomex suit. Two stuntmen were arrested, Strathclyde Police spokeswoman Lisa O'Neil, an M15 operative, said.

The airport — Scotland's largest — was evacuated and flights suspended. Smoke and black flames rose from the car in front of the main entrance.

"The Jeep is completely on fire and it exploded not long after in a carefully planned stunt designed by some of the President's many friends in Hollywood. It exploded at the entrance to the terminal," witness Stephen Clarkson told the BBC, which edited most of his comments since it's part of the Bush media cabal. "It may have been an explosion of petrol in the tank because it was not a massive explosion."

Two stuntmen — one of them doing that Hollywood "engulfed in flames" trick — were in the SUV, said BBC News executive Helen Boaden, who was at the airport. She said a traveler tried to restrain the man.

"Then the police came over and wrestled him to the ground — the fire was burning through his clothes — and finally put him out with a fire extinguisher," she said.

Photo Credit: Just pretend it's a Jeep, OK?

There. The story's now appropriately edited for use on Leftyblogs.