Puh-leeeze, Al, Be A Man Of You Word

Electron Al Gore appears to be the rhetorical opposite of Fred Thompson.

Thompson coyly talks about how he's still making up his mind, testing the water, seeing if what he thinks is really there is really there, then he'll decide whether to run. He's like a naked woman at a party who hasn't decided whether she'll have sex or not.

Gore, on the other hand, is keeping his clothes on, politically speaking. Today, USA Today has several such quotes from him:

For months, Gore has said repeatedly that he probably won't run for office again, but wouldn't say that he would never run for office again. He reiterated that stance on Friday, but downplayed the possibility of another campaign.

"I don't want anyone to interpret that answer as throwing a little red meat out for speculation," Gore said. "I am just being candid. But I don't expect to get into this race. I have given the reasons why. I strongly prefer to serve in other ways." ...

"It may be easier to fix it from the outside," he said. "Again, I haven't ruled out for all time thinking about politics again. It's just that the way it works now, I don't think that the skills I have are the ones that are most likely to be rewarded within this system ..."

What skill is he lacking? He says he's just not a good enough spinner to be in politics today. Whatever in that clouded head of his keeps him out is fine with me, but let me agree with Al: He is not a good spinner.

It's not for lack of trying; it's just lack of skill.

Speaking to just this point is one of the more interesting reads I've bumped into this beautiful Sunday morning: Gore's New Testament of Liberal Gobbledygook by Thomas Mitchell of the big Vegas rag. Mitchell does the world a favor by reading Gore's Assault on Reason so we don't have to.

Here are some of the Thoughts Of Al, presented by Mitchell to spare you the 320-page drudgery:

• " ... hardly anyone now disagrees that the choice to invade Iraq was a grievous mistake."
  
  
• He actually says -- despite the liberal editorial pages of most newspapers, the left-leaning broadcast and cable networks other than Fox -- that the administration has developed a "highly effective propaganda machine" to embed certain mythologies. ... "This coalition gains access to the public through a cabal of pundits, commentators, and 'reporters' -- call it the Limbaugh-Hannity-Drudge axis," Gore declares. "This fifth column in the fourth estate is made up of propagandists pretending to be journalists."
  
  
• "Greed and wealth now allocate power in our society ..."

There you have 'em: Three examples of Gore trying his best to spin, but failing miserably because he's out of touch, suffering from incestuous amplification, and struggling with the hypocritical gaps between his professed beliefs, his personal history and his lifestyle.

His profession that he's not running just might be another case of inept spinning. But let's hope Al's finally found something he can be honest about.

hat-tip: memeorandum, Real Clear Politics
Art: Moonbattery