Jon "The Impaler" for Gov

How's this for a plank in the campaign platform:

I despise and hate the Christian God the Father. He is my mortal enemy.

Yes, Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey, Ph.D., L.D.D.D. is running for governor of Minnesota. He describes himself as a "Satanic Dark Priest, Sanguinarian Vampyre and a Hecate Witch. My Magikal Path name is: Lord Ares." He says he bites his wife's neck and drinks her blood. Romantic! Here's a crummy picture of the loving couple.

I do like his anti-terror platform, though:

Any Terrorist who is caught in Minnesota while I am governor, will find out what the true meaning of my nickname: “The Impaler!” I will impale them right in front of our State Capital. Then Fed’s can take the terrorist’s body from the impaling stake. If the US Department of Justice (DOJ) wants to charge me with brutally murdering a terrorist, they may do so. I do not see an American Jury convicting me.

If elected, he's going to have a bit of an ACLU problem:

All religious beliefs will be protected under my administration. I will erect the "Wall of Religious Beliefs" in the Capital. This wall will have everything from the Wiccan Rede to the 10 Commandments.

Oh, and he's running for president in 2008.

h/t Inside Larry's Head via Gay Patriot